Wednesday, April 6, 2011

E is for Ecstatic and Ew

I have been trying to find the perfect "E" word all day. Most of the suggestions I've received are far too expressive or energetic for my energy levels today. Others were eccentric, egotistical or euphoric. After starting E is for Ew, E is for Expressions, E is for Exhausted and E is for Words that Contain E, but don't start with E, I decided to combine them into one Extravaganza - or, you know, entry.

After three and a half years, I am ecstatic that Angie has finally decided to potty train. We'd almost given up hope and had determined that the silver lining to investing in Pull-Ups and (later) Depends for the rest of our lives would pay off when she got to high school and the boys wouldn't date her. I mean, no one wants to date the girl who wets herself, picks her nose, farts a lot and eats dog food, right? After careful deliberation, Lenny and I determined that we were ok with that.

But, in one last attempt, I bribed her. Yes, I had to bribe her - and it worked! Sort of... I bought several small presents - Pez dispensers, plastic jewelry, crayons, coloring books, stick on tattoos, etc. Pink presents were for successfully peeing on the potty. Purple presents for pooping on the potty. It has been about a month now. All of the pink presents are long gone, but we still have several of the purple ones...

Which brings us to Ew... I always have to laugh when people who don't have children (but are about to) tell me how squeamish they are. Parenthood is not for sissies, and if you are a sissy or squeamish - well, you won't be for too long after they're born. Between diaper changes, snotty noses and instinctively cupping your hands to catch projectile vomit at 2 a.m., it doesn't take long.

Anyways, back to Ew, Angie still isn't comfortable pooping on the potty. I have no idea why. I make up pooping songs. I assure her that not only does everyone poop, but that it's fun. I have begged, cajoled, wheedled, offered special Dora popcicles and bribed her, all to no avail. We've had celebrations when she's successfully pooped on the potty, yet she will sneak off to poop in her pants in her closet if given the chance. I don't get it, but... well... Ew.


  1. I can't wait until Angie is a teenage and sifts through your archives! (I know my own kids will keel over when I show them some of the sharing I have done!)

    Parenting is not for squeamish indeed! One of my sons is still not into pooping on the potty and will resist pooping until he can no longer hold it in. I don't understand it, and he can't explain it... and it is KILLING ME!

    Here's a wish that all the purple presents disappear very soon. :)

  2. Love your post...sweet and funny...
    true...and relatable!


  3. LOL you are one funny lady! This is an excellent post. And I'm loving that we met so randomly...

    Now let me put on my behavioral analyst hat: First off, it's not bribing. The correct terminology is reinforcing (yes it is, cross my heart) appropriate behavior.

    The problem with the hiding-the-poop is the she is either 1) lacking the right antecedent (what comes before the behavior): look at the usual culprits -- did you make the bathroom a fun place, did you try to use a special potty that can be moved outside of the bathroom, does she get to use a special toy during elimination, those kind of things. Or it's 2) lacking the right consequence: do you let her have something super-special but ONLY for pooping in the potty, is it something that she really really wants and can absolutely not have otherwise, how do you react to mishaps, etc.

    I don't want to hog your post, but for a child not getting fully potty trained when she clearly has the capability to do so, I'd look at something missing in the process. Please feel free to let me know if you want to talk about this more.