I recently heard a few things that made me laugh.
A comedian was saying his son was very smart. First day of school he goes in to meet his teacher and she says "Roy. That's a name you don't hear every day!" To which the boy responded "Nope, I hear it every day."
My husband and I were talking about the lack of rain this Monsoon season, he tells me "It's a dry rain".
A recent ad Lenny saw on Craig's List for a motorcycle read "Appearantly when my wife told me to do whatever the f___ I wanted, she didn't mean it".