Twitter won't interfere with your work, and other lies

Once upon a time, not really all that long ago, personal computers were created. They were at once similar and vastly different than the computer - or perhaps mobile device - you're reading this on today. These were the dark days, before there was an Internet. Almost hard to believe, huh? Back then the closest thing there was to the Internet was something called a Bulletin Board System (BBS) which was run by a SYSOP (System Operator). Yes, they were dark days indeed.

Then came AOL. Chatrooms! We could converse with people from all over, it was incredible!

Fast forward to the dawn of Facebook. (Let's just skip over.. uh what was it? Oh, MySpace). Finally a way for lazy people to keep in touch with family and friends from all over. Not to mention build virtual farms and slay virtual thugs. And a place to share photos, or be tagged in photos, that you'd really rather your mom didn't see...

Holy cow, your mom is on Facebook! And.. shit.. so is your dad. 

Then businesses started to show up on Facebook. Who follows businesses on Facebook? Pfff.. wait... they offer cool stuff? OK, I'm in.

Why yes, I do want to be the Featured Oreo Fan of the week...

Best Buy? Let's bash on them publically! Oh hey, they actually repond. Wow.

Then came Twitter. What the heck is a Tweeter? Your mom isn't there. Neither is your dad. But @ShitMyDadSays is... and he was so popular he wrote a book.

I have a copy. So does your dad, who we all know rarely says anything worth publishing. Oh well.

Twitter. Mini-blogging. Who the heck wants that? How booooooring. Hey wait... there are some pretty cool people on there. Ok, I'll try it. Hey... this isn't so bad. I got tech support from my phone company - holy cow! Maybe there's something to this.

And so it begins. You've discovered Twitter and suddenly it's like you found the back door to a secret club full of really cool people. Even for a complete geek it can initially be intimidating, and then someone follows you. Eventually they retweet you. You're hooked. Got to get to 100 followers. Then 200. Then 500.

Your mom asks you about Twitter. You tell her there's a monthly fee. She's not interested. Yes!

Then you tell your boss that your company should totally be on Twitter. "What's a Twit?" he asks. You try to explain. You try again. You give up and ask him to trust you. He tells you to go ahead, but don't let it interfere with your other work. You assure him it won't. We all know that was a lie. That's ok, you're not alone.

Welcome to the Age of Twitter. If you're lucky, you'll meet some great folks who will support you, entertain you, help you, tutor you and ultimately make you wish that you all lived on the same block.